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The Funny Alphabet
 by: Edward Cogger
 Rank: 4
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A was an Actor,
'Tis clear to your view:
B was three Boys,
Forming letters for you.

C was a clown, who clever was found.
D was a dunce, and Harlequin bound,
E was soon formed with the aid of a child,
F in a frolic appear'd to be wild.

G was George Godfrey, a truant I fear,
H hand in hand, like two pillars appear.
I was an Indian figure for thee:
J was Jemima Mermaid, only see.

K was Kail Knowledge, to Kew he was bound,
L was Luke Lazy, he's now on the ground.
M Master Merryman, mark what I say,
N Neddy Noodle the Vicar of Bray.

S Simon Sobersides, serious and soft,
T Timothy Touchstone, tomboy and torch,
U Uniform, Union, and Unicorn trot,
V very vexatious his letters forgot.

W Walter and William
Were vex'd,
X in the Alphabet,
Is sure to stand next.

Y was a Youngster,
He'd play with his betters;
Z was a Zany,
For not knowing his letters.